Viva Las Vegas! ...Or not...

Steph and I decided to take a little trip to Las Vegas, and we invited the Mercers to join us. We left around noon on Tuesday, and so we didn't get to the resort tell about 4:00.

The insanity of Las Vegas basically struck us right away. As soon as we pulled in we saw a lady who appeared to be rather drunk and in a bikini draping herself all over this guy in the car right next to us. Weird.

Well, we couldn't get into our room until 5, so we were forced to just kill some time. We walked around the resort for a bit, just kinda checking it out, then we decided to kill the last 40 minutes by going to the bar by the pool for happy hour. We ordered some drinks and some appetizers. Lo and behold, they gave us the wrong appetizers. But who did they mix us up with? The crazy lady from the parking lot. So Jeff went over to reclaim our food, and had an awkward conversation with the clearly drunk lady, who seemed to be buying rounds for everyone and just being generally awkward.

By the time we had finished our drinks and food, we were able to check in, so we got our keys, went to our room, and got settled in. There are full kitchens in the room, so Steph and Carmen went shopping to buy some groceries, and Steph also forgot to pack underwear, so she needed to pick up some of those. Once they got back, we decided to hit up the strip and go to dinner.

As we were waiting at the front of the resort for the shuttle that runs between the resort and the strip, we witnessed the crazy drunk lady for a third, and most awkward, time. This time, her stuff was on a bench, and she was screaming at security with her daughter who couldn't have been more than 11 years old looking on. Apparently she was being kicked out of the resort and didn't like it very much. She even asked us if we thought security was being overbearing. AWKWARD. Well, she wouldn't listen to security, so they finally ended up calling the cops (when they said this the daughter burst into tears...poor girl).

Thankfully that was the last run in we had with that lady. But man...ridiculous. We found out later from the shuttle driver that she had run up a huge tab and blown a lot of money gambling, her fiance had left for Colorado without her because he was so mad at her and that she had stayed well past check out, and that was why she was being removed from the resort. Yeah...weird.

Anyway, we proceeded to the Excalibur and had dinner at a place called Dick's. It was a pretty interesting restaurant. The theme of it is that the waitresses are rather rude to you. They also make you wear funny hats, which usually are PG-13 if not R. Thankfully, Steph and I escaped, but the Mercers were both hit. Carmen wore a hat that said she faked 'things', and Jeff's hat said he didn't care, he faked the whole relationship. The girl sitting next to me, who was 13, had a hat that said "I stuff my training bra." And these were some of the more mild ones.




This is a picture of the Excalibur at night. Pretty cool looking.

After dinner we walked 'the strip'. It is pretty crazy. You have people on EVERY corner trying to give you these little cards that have pictures of prostitutes, and the numbers where they can be reached. DO NOT MAKE EYE CONTACT WITH THESE PEOPLE! I almost got a paper cut from the guy trying to shove these things at me when my glance strayed within 10 ft. of his general location.

Paris. Sheesh. Any city in the U.S. that builds an imitation of anything in France truly does deserve the name "Sin City" (I mean, it's bad enough that we have those bloody Quebec people on this side of the Atlantic!).
Besides going into the Excalibur to eat, the only other casino we went into was the Bellagio. And man was it trippy. I thought something had been slipped into my burger at Dick's and I had fallen into Wonderland to keep Alice company. Look at this crazy stuff.








After that, we went to the front of the same casino, the Bellagio, to witness their famous choreographed fountain show. Can't say I cared too much for the song (That "My Heart Will Go On" thing), but the show was pretty cool. And impressive. The pictures don't really show it, but some of those fountain bursts had to be upwards of 60 ft.







Walking back there was this awesome guy who had painted himself to look like a copper statue. He did 'robot' moves, and man...he leaned so far over...defied the laws of gravity.

Also on our way back we saw a sign of true insanity. Some guy walking the other way had long hair, very disheveled, somewhat balding on top, beady little eyes, and a trench coat. The guy was yelling at everyone. Didn't really understand what he was saying, but he would look at you, yell, and kinda half lung at you and then move on. Everybody laughed because the guy was so preposterous, but there were serious issues there. I wish I had had my camera at the ready, but alas it was not so.


This is a view of the strip from our room at the Cancun Resort.

The resort was pretty sweet. It had four water slides, which you can all enviously see us enjoying here. I told everyone I was going to be taking pictures, so they needed to pose when they came out. Carmen did a great job.

Jeff did an even better job.

Steph covered her face.

On the other side was a large lounge pool. It had this sweet cascading waterfall that you could hang out under. On the other side of it is a hot tub. Very nice.
Steph and Carmen boozing it up at 11:00 A.M. For shame.

A picture of the pool from our area.

The pyramid. On this side (obviously) is the lounge pool. You would climb to the top (or half way up if you were a sissy) to get to the water slides. We basically hung out at the pool almost all day on Wednesday. We went out for dinner at a delicious Italian place called "The Bootleggers Bistro". It was amazing.

Jeff abusing the locals.

The last day, after we checked out, we went to the Hoover Dam. Steph had never been before.


Pictures utterly fail to take in the magnitude of this thing. It is huge.



You might think this next picture is just a nice, casual shot of Carmen. That is not so. No offense to Carmen, but I could care less about her at this point in time. She was simply camouflage for me taking a picture of those European dudes behind her. Particularly the dude with the intense mullet. WOW! and those shorts. WOW. It is icing on the cake that the guy who would typically be normal next to Mr. Mullet is picking at his belly button. Man do I love this picture.


I had to get another picture. This guy really made me laugh.




[HELP! HELP! I'M BEING REPRESSED! You can delete my words Steph, but you can't deny the truth!!!]

This, in case you weren't sure, is not a real picture. This was a poster that I decided to take a picture of because it was totally sweet. I would love to be at the dam when they let all that water loose. That would be ridiculous.


After we were done with the dam, we went to a lookout for Lake Mead. It was pretty crazy how far below normal levels the water is. You can see where the parking lot for the beach/boat thing used to be way up...as well as the road that I would guess used to run along the shore.

And then you have this handy dandy comparison to see just how bad it is.

Sasha, this one is for you. You're the only one who will understand the incredible significance of this photo.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Working on the House

An Update of Cosmic Porportions

Now, The Moment You've All Been Waiting For!